Telling the truth can be liberating.
Let’s be honest with ourselves. How many of us make up a story or a whole mythology of our life in our minds? How many of us ruin our lives by subsequently supporting and feeding this myth, day after day, year after year?
Is our “self-image” a myth? Are our relationships based on this myth? In the end, could it be that our lives are merely bullshit stories created by our minds without us consciously choosing them?
Clearly, the answer is yes. Most people’s minds are constellations of groundless beliefs, interpretations based on past experiences, self-images created by the analytical mind and other lies. People lie to others and they lie to themselves. When we “live” like this, we deaden ourselves. Our lives become muffled, boring, routine lives.
The problem is that we are entangled in our own minds. This entanglement, these falsehoods, they can destroy our lives. When we make up a story, we become limited by it. Clinging to our story stops us from changing. And not changing means that we cannot grow, we can’t improve our lives.
The way out is to start telling the truth. The best place to start is with ourselves. Start by deconstructing your own myths, one brick at a time. Think of a lie you tell yourself and stop doing it. Then think of another lie. And crush that one as well. Think of the lies you tell other people, and stop telling those lies. The lies you tell your family or friends are also a part of your conceptual prison. The key is getting the ball rolling. Beginning the truth-telling is the hardest part.
Here’s an example: Many people create a self-image based on the “status” they want to have in society. They’ll go out and do anything to achieve it: The university degrees, the job title, the clothes, the house and the expensive car. And yet how many doctors, lawyers or accountants hate their lives? According to quite a few clinical psychologists, doctors and lawyers tend to be the least happy and least stable of all their clients.
The reason? Their self-image myth is so powerful, it has such control over their minds, that they can’t accept their own weaknesses and failures.
Often, their chosen career is incongruent with who they truly are and what they really want to get out of life. They chose a career that would project a certain image into society, rather than one that would make them feel good. It’s that simple. Now they hold on to their lie and carry on hating their lives.
“People will see me as an authority figure and give me status.” This is the classic career-self-image inferiority complex. Hey, nevermind that my life sucks, that I hate my life and that i feel like shit. It’s what others think of me matters. This is the mentality.
See my point? You have to look into yourself, discover your own lies, myths and false beliefs and start telling the truth to yourself for a change. Then start telling the truth to others. Slowly, you will become more and more free from your own bullshit story. And this is a major triumph, because it is the stories you tell yourself that are stopping you from getting what you want out of your life. When you cut yourself off from your emotions, the result is stress, anxiety, depression, allergies and all sorts of health complaints.
Do you use your mind as a tool to a better life, or does your mind use you and make you miserable?
If you look inside yourself and see a new truth, what are you going to do about it?
Konstantin.